Leslie - I thought that I would share this with you - kind of a cute story.
SILICON PINES
THE TOUGHEST DECISION:
SHOULD MY LOVED ONE BE PLACED IN AN ASSISTED COMPUTING
FACILITY?
For family members, it is often the most difficult and
painful decision they will face: to accept that a
loved one - a parent, a spouse or perhaps a sibling -
is technologically impaired and should no longer be
allowed to live independently, or come near a computer
or electronic device without direct supervision. The
time has come to place that loved one into the care of
an Assisted Computing Facility. But you have
questions... so many questions. We at Silicon Pines
want to help.
WHAT EXACTLY IS AN "ASSISTED COMPUTING FACILITY?"
Sometimes referred to as "Homes for the
Technologically Infirm" "Technical Invalid Care
Centers," or "Homes for the Technically Challenged,"
Assisted Computing Facilities (ACFs) are modeled on
assisted living facilities, and provide a safe,
structured residential environment for those unable to
handle even the most common, everyday multi-tasks.
Most fully accredited ACFs, like Silicon Pines, are an
oasis of hope and encouragement that allow residents
to lead productive, technologically relevant lives
without the fear and anxiety associated with actually
having to understand or execute the technologies themselves.
WHO SHOULD BE IN AN ACF?
Sadly, technology is advancing at such a dramatic rate
that many millions, of all ages, will never truly be
able to understand it, putting an undue burden on
those friends and family members who must explain it
to them. But unless the loved one is suffering from a
truly debilitating affliction, such as
Reinstallzheimers, the decision to commit is entirely personal.
You must ask yourself:
*How frustrated am I that my parent/sibling/spouse is
unable to open an e-mail attachment?"
*How much of my time should be taken up explaining the
difference between 'save' and 'save as'?"
*How many times can I bear to hear my dad say, 'Hey,
can I replace the motherboard with a fatherboard? Ha ha ha!"
To make things easier, we have prepared a list of
Warning Signs, which we encourage you to return often,
or, if you can't figure out how to bookmark it, print out.
Also, please take a moment to read "I'm Glad I'm in
Here! - A Resident's Story."
MUST IT BE FAMILY, OR CAN I PLACE ANYONE IN AN ACF?
Several corporations have sought permission to have
certain employees, or at times entire sales
departments, committed to ACFs. At present, however,
only direct family or self-internment can commit
individuals. The reason is simple: there are not
nearly enough ACFs in the world to accommodate all the
technologically challenged. For example, there are
currently only 860,000 beds available in ACFs, but
there are 29 million AOL users.
HOW MUCH WILL IT COST?
ACF rents range from free up to $12,500 per month. The
disparity is currently a point of contention in the
ACF industry. Many residents are covered through
government programs such as Compuaid or Compucare, but
reimbursement rates are low and only cover a portion
of the fees.
Exacerbating the situation are the HMOs (HelpDesk
Maintenance Organizations), which often deny coverage,
forcing residents to pay out of pocket or turn to
expensive private techcare insurers such as
BlueCache/BlueScreen.
Offsetting the costs are technology companies
themselves, many of which subsidize ACFs. Firms such
as Microsoft, Dell, Qualcomm, and America Online will
pay up to 100 percent of a resident's monthly bill,
but there is a catch. ISPs, for instance, require
residents to sign service contracts lasting a year or
more. Microsoft, meanwhile, prohibits the installation
of any competitive software, while Priceline requires
that residents buy shares of its stock, which seems
onerous but saves residents on lavatory tissue.
HOW OLD MUST I BE TO HAVE SOMEONE COMMITTED?
Until very recently, you had to be 18 or older to
legally commit a family member. However, the now
famous local court case Frazzle vs. Frazzle and
Frazzle has cleared the way for minors to commit their parents.
In that case, 15-year-old Josh Frazzle of Topeka had
his 39-year-old parents committed to an ACF in Kansas
City after a judge ruled Drub and Mitzi Frazzle were a
"danger to themselves and the community." According to
court records, Josh told his parents about the "I Love
You" virus and warned them not to click attachments,
then the next day his parents received an "I Love You"
e-mail and clicked on the attachment
because, they explained, "it came from someone we knew."
WHAT SHOULD I LOOK FOR IN AN ACF?
First, make sure it's a genuine Assisted Computing
Facility, and not an Assisted Living Facility. To tell
the difference, observe the residents. If they look
rather old and tend to openly discuss bowel movements,
this is probably "assisted living." On the other hand,
if they vary in age and say things like, "I'm supposed
to figure that out? I'm not Bill Gates you know!,
" this is probably "assisted computing."
Also, at a well-run ACF, residents should lead full,
independent lives, and should be allowed the use of
many technology devices, including telephones,
electric toothbrushes, and alarm clocks.
However, only a facility's Licensed Techcare
Professionals (LTPs) should perform computational or
technological tasks such as installing programs or
saving e-mail attachments. And LTPs should NEVER
answer residents' questions because studies have shown
that answering user questions inevitably makes things
worse. Instead, residents should simply have things
done for them, relieving them of the pressure to
"learn" or "improve."
CAN A RESIDENT EVER GET OUT?
No.
OK, THIS SOUNDS PROMISING. HOW CAN I LEARN MORE?
For your enlightenment, we offer extensive information
on Silicon Pines and the ACF lifestyle, which can be
found by clicking one of the links in the navigation
bars found at both the top and bottom of this page.
But whatever you decide, keep in mind that due to
demand, ACFs now have long waiting lists. WebTV & AOL
users alone will take years to absorb.
SILICON PINES ... Where you never have to install
software or set up a VCR to record.
Happy Valentines Day to you all, from Leslie
Season's greetings 