This is pretty cute, about MOMS!!

 

----- Original Message -----

From: junechick03@aol.com

To: allcrl6@msn.com ; ladywolf1960@aol.com ; vidalyadira@yahoo.com ; sarahbearaa@yahoo.com

Sent: Sunday, April 23, 2006 1:55 AM

Subject: This is pretty cute, about MOMS!!

 

 

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going
to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My
mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the
carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't
straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4.
My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My
mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your
neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me
FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an
accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give
you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of
OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me
about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your
neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until
all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about
WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through
it."

12 My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've
told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the
CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you
out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop
acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There
are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful
parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION!

"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about
RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother
taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are
going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your
sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother
taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running
to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't
eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me
GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me
about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a
barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age,
you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about ANIMALS.
"Clean your
room it looks like a pig sty."


26. And my favorite:

My mother
taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out
just like you!"